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Post by BlacKnightZero on May 21, 2015 8:41:25 GMT -5
Still too long and weird as fuck, but a lot more enjoyable.
7.8/10
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Post by Residisi on May 21, 2015 13:33:46 GMT -5
Still too long and weird as fuck, but a lot more enjoyable. 7.8/10 bitch you dont know quality part 2Mista, having watched the scene unfold through a window, malignantly emerged from the Quarry bar. Tribble cracked his knuckles and grinned. The brawl was fierce and brutal, but rather one sided. In no time at all Tribble was sitting upon a pile of semi-conscious, fat, mostly middle aged men. Mista held Dere in a clumsy yet firm choke hold. "If I am not mistaken, we have just defeated the closest thing to a standing army Kentucky possesses." said Tribble, "Which I think grants us certain privileges, such as governing this shit place from this point onwards." Dere made a strangled sound. "I'm quite happy with how this place is run already, with only a few notable exceptions. The first issue I would like to address is Kentucky's lack of a charismatic head of state. Hello, you are henceforth President for Life of Kentucky.""Seconded." said Mista."What?" said Hello numbly. "Don't worry, you're just a beautiful figurehead, you won't actually have to do anything. Naturally I will be your First Minister. Mista, you are now commissioner of the Kentucky Police Force. Congratulations." "Thank you." said Mista, who eyed the softly moaning pile of cops menacingly. Tribble continued, "Dere, you keep running the resort and whipping tourists or whatever the hell it is that you do. ResIsBestStat, you are now Minister of Quarries." "Really? Wow, thanks!" said ResIsBestStat."I'm glad you approve. The duties of the Minister of Quarries are as follows: You must provide any item on your menu to the President for Life, First Minister, and Police Commissioner at any time and in any quantity." said Tribble. Suddenly the terrible implications of his new job dawned on ResIsBestStat. "No. NO! You guys are all NERDS! I can't afford to feed you!" "Well, I think whatever passes for a treasury on this land can be used to compensate you." said Tribble. ResIsBestStat looked somewhat mollified. "That's what this was all about, wasn't it?" said Hello. "You just wanted free crabs. We're all just prawns in your sick game." Laughing merrily, Tribble dismounted the pile of cops and clapped his friend on the back. "ResIs, stoke the fires! My colleagues and I are hungry!"THE END
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Post by hellohello on May 21, 2015 14:36:15 GMT -5
Resis, I hope you're reading this, because I'm only gonna type it once
This was actually enjoyable.
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Post by Residisi on May 21, 2015 14:49:57 GMT -5
Resis, I hope you're reading this, because I'm only gonna type it once This was actually enjoyable. will you read my manga senpai
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Post by BlacKnightZero on May 21, 2015 15:58:21 GMT -5
Previously on The ResIsBestStat Show: Resis was a huge nerd because he was tight on money, so he got a job as a barista at a Starbucks or something. Little did he know he gave a really evil crime boss man the wrong coffee. The crime boss dude was super fucking upset about that, so he put a hit on Resis. Resis barely managed to avoid his fate by jumping out of the window of his apartment and scaling a fence like Liam Neeson did in Taken 3. It was pretty fucking intense when that happened. After doing that, he fought the assassin in a one-on-one fist fight because the assassin is a fucking asshole and holds his pride above most other things I guess. He befriended the assassin by using his barista skills to give him like a coffee or something. The assassin removed his mask to reveal that it was Tony all along, trying to settle Resis' quarries by killing him. Now that Resis had regained the trust of Tony, he can fully realize his dream of becoming the greatest barista ever, and also the Hokage, and finding the One Piece or something. Resis stared down the scope of a sniper rifle. He was hoping to kill the crime boss sometime today, but he'd been aiming the sniper in the same position for 5 hours, and the boss was nowhere to be found. "Shouldn't we hurry this up?" Tony asked, tiring of the situation. "I know you've got your quarries to settle, but you're not going to settle them today." "You shut your mouth, Tony." Resis barked back. "Trust me, I know what I'm doing. I'm going to get that Otaku son of a bitch, even if it kills me." "Have you even ever held a sniper before? I'm only looking out for your own s--" "Don't worry...." Resis turned around and gazed at Tony. "It'll all be okay." Tony was unaware of the crime boss' true identity, and so he had nothing of value to offer to tell him. All he could do was hope Resis knew where to look for the boss in the streets of urban Italy(or wherever Resis actually lives). Resis was having flashbacks of his horrible time at the Starbucks, where his potential as a barista was being wasted. He swore on his life that he would make this crime boss pay for pitting Tony against him. This is one quarry that could not go unsettled. Suddenly, out of nowhere, the boss appeared in Resis' sights! "Tony, I got the shot! Should I take it?" "Well yeah." Tony replied, casually. "Alright man if you say so." Resis lined the boss into the crosshairs of the rifle, and pulled the trigger, waiting for the moment when his quarry finally became settled. The bullet sure fired, but it did not hit the crime boss man. Instead it hit his large muscular bodyguard, covered head to toe in shining golden armor. Immediately, Resis realized that he had been set up since the beginning. "Tony, look out, it was a set up!" However, Tony was no longer there. He was unwittingly leading the boss and his guard to Resis' location with a tracking chip on his coat. The boss' ninja squad had swiftly taken Tony to their lair, leaving Resis to deal with the armored bodyguard, who was currently leaping onto the rooftop that they were located at. Resis rolled out of the way to avoid being crushed as the huge man landed heavily onto the rooftop, almost breaking through it. The giant then took of his gold helmet, revealing his face before he spoke to Resis with a familiar voice. "So we meet again... ...brother."
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Post by Residisi on May 22, 2015 6:23:03 GMT -5
Previously on The ResIsBestStat Show: Resis was a huge nerd because he was tight on money, so he got a job as a barista at a Starbucks or something. Little did he know he gave a really evil crime boss man the wrong coffee. The crime boss dude was super fucking upset about that, so he put a hit on Resis. Resis barely managed to avoid his fate by jumping out of the window of his apartment and scaling a fence like Liam Neeson did in Taken 3. It was pretty fucking intense when that happened. After doing that, he fought the assassin in a one-on-one fist fight because the assassin is a fucking asshole and holds his pride above most other things I guess. He befriended the assassin by using his barista skills to give him like a coffee or something. The assassin removed his mask to reveal that it was Tony all along, trying to settle Resis' quarries by killing him. Now that Resis had regained the trust of Tony, he can fully realize his dream of becoming the greatest barista ever, and also the Hokage, and finding the One Piece or something. Resis stared down the scope of a sniper rifle. He was hoping to kill the crime boss sometime today, but he'd been aiming the sniper in the same position for 5 hours, and the boss was nowhere to be found. "Shouldn't we hurry this up?" Tony asked, tiring of the situation. "I know you've got your quarries to settle, but you're not going to settle them today." "You shut your mouth, Tony." Resis barked back. "Trust me, I know what I'm doing. I'm going to get that Otaku son of a bitch, even if it kills me." "Have you even ever held a sniper before? I'm only looking out for your own s--" "Don't worry...." Resis turned around and gazed at Tony. "It'll all be okay." Tony was unaware of the crime boss' true identity, and so he had nothing of value to offer to tell him. All he could do was hope Resis knew where to look for the boss in the streets of urban Italy(or wherever Resis actually lives). Resis was having flashbacks of his horrible time at the Starbucks, where his potential as a barista was being wasted. He swore on his life that he would make this crime boss pay for pitting Tony against him. This is one quarry that could not go unsettled. Suddenly, out of nowhere, the boss appeared in Resis' sights! "Tony, I got the shot! Should I take it?" "Well yeah." Tony replied, casually. "Alright man if you say so." Resis lined the boss into the crosshairs of the rifle, and pulled the trigger, waiting for the moment when his quarry finally became settled. The bullet sure fired, but it did not hit the crime boss man. Instead it hit his large muscular bodyguard, covered head to toe in shining golden armor. Immediately, Resis realized that he had been set up since the beginning. "Tony, look out, it was a set up!" However, Tony was no longer there. He was unwittingly leading the boss and his guard to Resis' location with a tracking chip on his coat. The boss' ninja squad had swiftly taken Tony to their lair, leaving Resis to deal with the armored bodyguard, who was currently leaping onto the rooftop that they were located at. Resis rolled out of the way to avoid being crushed as the huge man landed heavily onto the rooftop, almost breaking through it. The giant then took of his gold helmet, revealing his face before he spoke to Resis with a familiar voice. "So we meet again... ...brother." The best anime ever, without any doubt, is Evangelion. Not only is the plot amazing, it delivers important themes about society and has a lot of symbols about religion. Pisses me off that people don't understand how beautiful this anime is and I just want to punch them in the face. 9/11 not evangelion there was an attempt
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Post by Residisi on Jun 6, 2015 8:46:22 GMT -5
ayy dumb bitches I found this cool site right here.Ayy choose one title and write the plot about the title you get as an anime. I got Knight Cowboys on my first try so here's how I think it would work out: There's this weird knight found in a battlefield, during the First Crusade. This knight however doesn't wear Christian or Turkish armor, instead he wears some really weird armor, like Lovecraftian weird. So the Church brings him to Pope Dickson XIII and the Pope asks the knight his name, but the knight has amnesia because every good anime needs some amnesia now and then. So the Pope orders his servants to grab the sucker's armor, but the knight is really protective of his armor for some reason and accidentally slaughters a servant because his armor suddenly grew spikes. Pope orders people to kill that fucker and knight runs away because Armor of Thorns = OP. Knight runs and steals a horse and since he's near Turkeyland he comes upon a Turkish city where he isn't killed on sight because his armor isn't Christian. There he sleeps like a poor beggar since he has no money, but suddenly the city is attacked by a herd of raging bulls, that appeared out of nowhere. Knight is forced to defend himself and sees a weird guy in Eastern Armor slaughter bulls as well with the best Japanese sword ever. Eastern guy is impressed by Knight's spiky armor and offers him a job, saying that he's a rogue knight who goes killing people for moolah. Knight agrees and they both get handsomely rewarded by the ruler of that city, since Knight's thorn armor can be very persuasive. Eventually they go roaming around the world, slaughtering numerous wild animals that assault cities, such as bulls, boars etc. For that they are called "Cowboys". They also get more people until they are a team of five, composed by a berserker, a tank, a ninja, an Eastern guy and the Knight. One day they feast on the remains of a bull they have recently slain, and have strange nightmares about fire and lava and dark and shit like that. Knight guy also remembers some of his memories. Suddenly in the year 1099 the towns start becoming dark and gloomy and a terrible plague starts. The Cowboys investigate and find out that the blood of the creatures they have slain has begun to infect the very soil, causing Lovecraftian monsters to manifest. Knowing that they will die if the worlds keep going on like this, the Cowboys slay more beasts and feast on them, discovering that in the year 1000 Satan was about to destroy the world before being calmed by a mysterious paladin. This paladin however was corrupted by evil and only managed to delay the destruction of the world. Satan however is located in the Vesuvius in Italy, so the gang goes to Italy and find it guarded by gigantic creatures, about 60m in height. Berserker and Tank fight numerous creatures, but are slain and devoured. Their sacrifice however allows the other Cowboys to get through and see Satan growing stronger minute by minute, the lava pool around him slowly rising. Ninja shoots Satan with an arrow and is instantly incinerated because of that by Satan's fiery gaze. Eastern guy and the Knight realize that they were only deluding themselves in defeating Satan, whom is a foe far stronger than they are. Knight guy however notices that his armor is very similar to the decorations around the Vesuvius, and after touching the ashes around Satan he remembers that he was a general that died in Pompeii, and was reborn through Satan's black magic. Knowing that black magic is the only thing that can harm Satan, Knight becomes a giant ball of spikes and jumps inside Satan's mouth, going deep inside his stomach before exploding while Judas Priest songs start playing. Satan isn't killed however, merely weakened by a light stomachache. He decides however to call it a day and retreats to his pit, his monsters following him as well. Eastern guy meanwhile sheds a tear before committing seppuku, because fuck happy endings. So, how did I do?
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Post by BlacKnightZero on Jun 10, 2015 15:47:17 GMT -5
Previously, on the RIBS Show: After beating the hell out of that clone of Resis calling itself his brother in one of the coolest fights you'd ever see in your life, Resis swiftly decided to track down Tony after he was kidnapped by the gang they were after. Resis soon found out that the gang was not, in fact, based in his home town of Italy. In order to find information, he had to travel to Leeds, England, where the infamous info brokers resided. The brokers were none other than the former members of Soft Cell, Marc Almond and Dave Bell. They told him that the answer he sought was in Mexico City. Unfortunately, that was all they could tell him, for they feared being targeted by the Boss himself if they gave out his location. With only that, Resis was forced to travel all the way into the city of Mexico City, Mexico. What exciting things await him there? Find out, on the Resis Beststat Show!
"Shit..." Resis quietly mumbled to himself walking through the streets of Mexico City. He couldn't believe he was forced to come to this city just to find tony and the Boss. Were Soft Cell lying to him? He had no choice but to trust them, after all they did come up with the 1987 hit song, "Tainted Love", but so far there were no other leads. Resis walked over to a local alcohol and taco stand and spoke to the owner. "Uno cerveza, por favour." He payed the man a correct amount of pesos in exchange for the cerveza, and then started to chat with the man. "You know any places a crime boss might hang out in?" Resis asked. "I got no idea what you're talking about, man. Now order something else or get outta my face." Resis tipped the man a few more pesos to bribe the information out of him. "Well if you put it like that," the vendor began. "A guy moved in a few days ago, he's had a lot of guys surrounding him recently. He frequents the club around the corner, but I'm warning you, he don't look friendly." Resis looked around, and saw the aforementioned club. La Pequeña Hamburguesa, it had been pretty popular as of late, and a typical spot for crime-related activities. If the Boss was was in Mexico City, he'd be there. Resis took some time to prepare himself. He packed the necessary weapons and supplies to get ready to fight the Boss and his forces. The next day, he entered the club with the intent of interrogating somebody and finding Tony's location. To his surprise, the Boss was not there, and the club was ransacked. "Who did this to you!?" He asked one of the civilians lying injured on the floor. "It... was..." The civilian died before he could tell Resis what happened there. "SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!" Resis couldn't contain his rage. All he wanted to do was make coffee, and now everything is ruined. Thanks to his pursuit of the Boss, Tony was captured, and several innocent civilians were killed. What was the point? Was this what Soft Cell were afraid of? He wasn't sure what to do at this point. "Don't worry Resis, I can help you." A familiar face spoke to Resis, placing her hand on his shoulder. It was none other than Bob Baffert, come to assist Resis in his endeavors! "Bob? What are you doing here?" Resis asked. "I was in the area when I heard that you were after the Boss, too. I've got a quarry to settle with him as well. I can help train you, so you can find your friend and finish your mission." "But don't you see? He killed all of these people. There's no way we can beat him." "Don't worry, Resis. I have a plan!"
つづきます...
(Fuck i spent too long making this......)
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Post by Residisi on Jun 10, 2015 15:53:09 GMT -5
>no gonna fly now during the training montage
fucking trash tier story worse than m night shymaladingdong
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Post by DeredereChan on Jul 22, 2015 4:56:13 GMT -5
What's this? A proof of concept for a story I'm writing? A story involving one of the characters I regularly role play as? And not only that, but once it is finished, it will go into a thread that I've been talking with Resis about? Who would have guessed? Constructive Criticism appreciated. Enjoy.
01
START The following will be a recollection of the events within a particularly menacing week, a week in which I found myself in a most unfortunate position. From this recollection comes bitter memories, sour memories, without a bit of sweetness to them. Let me recall the events of that one week which I would like to forget if entirely possible, and even if not, I would like to stop them from ever happening. The events of that fateful week are now ingrained in my memory, so that I remember even the smallest of details. For instance, The events of the week in question had reared it's ugly head on the 19th of June, and the problems didn't truly subside until the 26th. This week was notable for being particularly wet for this time of the year, and not only was there considerable showers during this period, at almost no time did the ominous clouds leave the heavens above. Despite the damp weather, however, the temperature remained rather high, leading to the dreaded humidity that plagued the state of New York throughout the whole week. Needless to say, the denizens of Kashmir, including myself, were understandably upset at the direction the weather had taken. It was during this miserable week that I experienced Hell itself. Acting as an effect to the aforementioned cause, an odd event happened. The local species of frogs, which usually lived out of sight underground or in the many ponds in the surrounding wilderness, began to be a common sight in the streets of Kashmir. This was more ominous event than I could ever know. Frogs. A Ranidae, a carnivore, an amphibian. Ever since, I can't stand frogs. I'm afraid of frogs. Just as I'm afraid of the events that occurred between June 19th and June 16th. Please, listen what I have to say. 02
START
June 19th, 197#, 8:15 AM SPLASH Perhaps I should have watched my steps more carefully, because my tennis shoe clad foot managed to find it's way into yet another puddle. The man who had come on the radio yesterday had told me that there would be sunshine without a cloud in the sky, as well as moderate temperatures that would surely be comfortable. But the landscape around me was showing a completely different story. dark, gloomy clouds covered the sky above like some sort of ominous blanket, making it hard to think about anything besides them. A moderate rain sprinkled down from them, and lucky enough for me, I had been unable to find my umbrella anywhere in my house. After all, I wasn't expecting showers at this time of year. To make matters worse, a choking humidity had made it's presence clear. At times, I felt like I was swimming more than I was walking. The heat made my walk nearly impossible, and the rain did little to help. Cursing my absentmindedness leading me to the puddle, I trudged onward to my destination. What was my destination, you ask? It was a simple jot to the bus stop, and from there, a grocery store on the other side of Kashmir. At the time, I was deadset on making a nice dinner for my boyfriend Joey, because... Well, there actually wasn't much of a reason behind my actions. When you love someone enough, the things you do for them no longer have to have a reasoning behind them. The hoops you jump through for your loved ones become unnoticeable in time. That's why I believe that love is easily the most widespread form of madness on this planet. But I suppose that's a story for another time, as I had just made my way to the bus stop. There was a small sort of canopy over the bus stop thankfully, which gave me a welcome shelter from the rain. In addition to this, there was a small bench, which was a nice touch. Surely such a bench didn't need to be in this place, but someone had put it there anyways. It's small things like this that makes me happy to I quickly sat down to catch some rest. Not that I needed any, of course, I'm always in top physical shape, but I like to conserve energy when I have the chance. With the humidity getting to me, I quickly took off the jacket I was wearing to keep the rain off of me. It helped keep me dry, but the heat was nearly unbearable. I began to consider the merits of tying the jacket around my waist as opposed to simply holding it. Surely it would be more efficient to tie it around my waist, but would that be the most fashionable thing to do? While I thought this conundrum out in my head, I noticed a bullfrog resting atop a wooden pole not too far away from me. It had a lazy expression, and I assumed that it was looking at me, although it logically could have been looking anywhere. I stare back at it in a vaguely violent way, hoping to intimidate it somewhat. Obviously, my plan fails, as the frog doesn't do so much as move a muscle. My face relaxes as I sigh in defeat. It was funny that I decided to interact with the frog, as even then, I wasn't totally enamored with the creatures. But I prefer the company of animals to the company of people any day of the week. I don't remember most anyone who was at the bus stop with me that day, which is odd because I remember most every other detail. I suppose I go out of my way to ignore other people at times. Of course, there was a very large exception to this sitting right next to me. I would have liked to ignore him if at all possible. And if I could have ignored him, I most certainly would have. But no one can change fate. I suppose.
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Post by Residisi on Jul 23, 2015 6:17:58 GMT -5
very edgy and i think that the frog represents her virginity lost in the hands of Joey 9/11 In all seriousness it's pretty well written and gives more insight in Izzy's character. Gibe moar pls.
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Post by Residisi on Jul 23, 2015 9:44:26 GMT -5
We all know what happened in 1986, during a cold, April day. Systems failed, ignorance reached a new limit and our incapacity to handle complicated situations has never been so evident. The Chernobyl disaster was a great blow to the Soviet Union, whom had complete jurisdiction over the site, not to mention it being one of the worst nuclear power plant accidents in mankind's small history. However, no-one cared about the deaths and the destruction caused by the immense wave of radiation that spread throughout the land, purging it of its inhabitants and of its resources. The things that went missing were simply replaced by objects that were more alien in nature, something that mankind could have never made on its own.
My name is Major Degtyarev, an agent of the USS, also known as the Ukraine Security Service. In my field of work I mostly engage in reconnaissance missions and scouting, but never before have I been assigned such a suicidal task. After the nuclear fallout in Chernobyl, scientists analyzing that corrupted area would realize that something was wrong. Their vast knowledge on the laws of physics had turned on them as they discovered a small area where radiation seemingly corroded anything that passed through that area. It was something impossible, radiation didn't work way and the scientists knew it well, but as one of them walked there their bones and flesh were completely melted until only a primordial soup remained. It was truly an anomaly, hence why said term was utilized while describing these bizarre "hot spots", areas where our perception of physics seemingly crumbled as unexplainable events started happening. We could only predict what kind of anomaly it was and what it would do, but we would never know why would that happen and how to prevent it.
And yet, despite Chernobyl being some sort of a minefield with these unexplainable events, several people of the Soviet Union would abandon their common lives and head there. During the early stages of the Chernobyl disaster, many lower class citizens quickly abandoned their lives and explored the irradiated zone, searching for any objects the victims had lost. It was still a power plant after all, so it must have had some neat treasury of sorts, be it chemicals to sell or money to loot, human nature is quite disgusting, taking advantage of those whom had just perished in order to obtain a certain material that would have just made their suffering slightly less. Money is the source of all sin, after all.
Unluckily for the fools, the radiation in that zone of alienation was too much for the human body to handle. Several of these "urban explorers" were found dead in some of the secluded areas of the large power plant, but it seemed as if not all of them had died there. Some were thought of having survived, since it appeared that those whom returned gave birth to disgusting abominations, their own semen corrupted by the mysteries of that secluded areas. Despite the dangers, many people would keep infiltrating the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone through mysterious means. Said people were called "Stalkers" by the folk living nearby, a term that sounds strange with the modern vocabulary we use nowadays, but still makes sense if you think of the archaic term, also known as "A person who goes through (usually an area) in order to follow a prey." And that prey is money, ladies and gentlemen.
Indeed, the area around Chernobyl had mutated, just like those who entered there. Not only was man vulnerable to radiation, but the earth itself was morphed by this poison, and the anomalies were only one piece of the puzzle. Eventually, the entire area of Chernobyl became an irradiated wasteland filled with incomprehensible events happening around it and artifacts that were alien in nature. This area was now called "The Zone" by fellow Stalkers, whom entered and left the area, eluding the military guarding it. As a member of the USS, I can surely say that our system is not capable of dealing with pillagers or "gravediggers" as the government wants to call them, believing that they are simply causing their own death by merely stepping in The Zone, and despite that numerous government officials and scientists whom explored The Zone have all perished, while Stalkers come and go, leaving with nothing in hand and returning with peculiar artifacts that give superhuman abilities, selling them to the highest bidder.
Eventually, my leaders grew tired of being constantly beaten by "lawless individuals". They assembled a team of operatives and prepared six choppers for an assault that was known as Operation Fairway, a suicidal operation that was supposed to allow the government to have complete control of the Zone by sending its choppers to the edge of the perimeter. Now, I don't know all the details of the plan, I just know that it carefully planned and analyzed for any possible failures and according to the government it had a 100% success rate. Obviously, it failed. Six choppers crashed around the Zone, and no-one was brave enough to volunteer to go there in order to investigate, since numerous teams had never returned once entering that cursed land. Fortunately for them, they had a former Stalker in their ranks: Me.
I was quickly given a generic assault rifle, a pistol, a combat knife and some supplies that would last at least three days in the Zone. I didn't have much of a choice, it was either that or being accused of mutiny. I charged the Zone head on, wearing a closed respiratory suit made specifically for me. These wonders of modern science were complex suits that had multiple filters in them, allowing me to survive the noxious radiation in the most dreadful parts of the Zone. As I entered the point of no return, I found myself both fascinated and terrified by the wasteland in front of me. Grass still grew and water still filled its wide swamps, but the Zone was as desolate as ever. Stalkers only formed a small part of its population, and I knew it well.
I walked forward, rifle in my hand as I tried to make as less noise as possible. The critters and fauna inhabiting the Zone aren't as docile as you would think about a dog or a cat. There were no docile animals there, it was survival of the fittest. An animal's diet there consisted mainly on meat, other animals, more meat and Stalkers. Some of the weaker beasts were forced to survive on a herbivore diet, but when they saw an opportunity, such as seeing a lone Stalker sleeping near a campfire, they would to obscene things to the poor fellow, the kind that your typical farm cow wouldn't be able to do.
And as I walked, I saw a whole pack of these creatures, slowly chasing a group of mutated pigs, that looked like fleshy balls of meat with four sticks for limbs. These pigs are usually called "Fleshes" by local Stalkers, due to their fleshy exterior which makes them extremely vulnerable animals. The predators meanwhile were a horde of mutated dogs, radiation having changed their body and caused their jaws to acquire special properties that reinforced their molecular structure. In poor man's words: Their bites hurt like a bitch and they never leave their grip. If you shove them aside, they'll just pull your flesh as well, and you don't want to bleed in the Zone: It just gives other mutants a trail that leads specifically to you.
I cautiously observed the pack, taking out a pair of binoculars from my backpack and camouflaging myself with the nearby bushes. I observed as the dogs voraciously devoured the pack of Flesh, and I knew that the same would happen to me if they found me. Luckily, the surviving pigs were leading them in the opposite direction of where the first chopper was located, but unfortunately for me, I was surprised by the superior predator.
"Nu vse tebe pizda!" A Stalker said behind me as he placed a shotgun on my head as I lied prone on the ground to avoid being detected. He talked with a very dirty Russian slang, saying that he would fucking kill me and fuck my wife. I had no choice but to simply await until the moment where he was distracted, knowing that his shotgun would be faster than my pistol in this case. However, Lady Luck spared me the cruel fate of death by sending a messenger to act in her place. A Stalker in front of me hided from the one threatening me and slowly hid behind a set of bushes as he suddenly burst out of them and shot the man's chest repeatedly with a handgun. The Russian Stalker would unceremoniously collapse on the ground, dead. However, both I and my savior knew that the dogs would smell the scent of a fresh corpse, so we quickly ran away from that scene, as the dogs slowly turned their eyes around and saw their next meal. I only caught a small glance of them sprinting towards my assailant like a raging bull as the proceeded to tear off his clothes and devour him, piece by piece. I surely wouldn't have wanted to die like this.
The Stalker who saved me was called Gonta and he was quite friendly indeed. He told me to be more careful in the Zone, which made me think that he was an expert Stalker of sorts, and he quickly gave me a small can once we were safe. "Tourist's Meal", he called it. Supposedly, it was what newcomers into the Zone were given to eat by Stalkers who took them under their wing. It was a funny way of calling stolen property, since I quickly recognized the can and deduced that it was a military ration and Gonta confirmed that, saying that a squad had raided a nearby military bunker and given these to those worthy. Still, I felt quite famished, and not eating it would have looked suspicious to my "friend".
After our meal at a nearby campfire, I started asking Gonta some questions, mostly about the crashed helicopters.
"Well, I only saw glances of them to be honest." He said, cleaning his rifle. "But I do think that one landed in the old power plant nearby. You know which one." He said, as I nodded. It was an old plant that used to produce electricity, at least before the Chernobyl disaster. "..But I wouldn't go there if I was you." Gonta said, as he started toggling the various firing modes of the rifle, as some sort of game. "That place is now an anomaly as well, and a big one at that. It has killed so many Stalkers and gained so much fame that it has been called the "Iron Forest" anomaly." He said, as I nodded and asked him more questions about the anomaly in particular.
"This anomaly has killed dozens thanks to its volatile nature. Somehow, the radiation affected the electricity in the plant and caused a mobile field of electricity to manifest. This field basically flies around the area at a lightning fast speed. In fact, it's so fast that you can't even see the anomaly itself." He said, as he stopped toying with his rifle and stood up. "Supposedly, the only way to even attempt to survive this anomaly is to shoot it, since any form of movement in its radius causes a violent burst of electricity, giving you a few seconds to make your move. However, it always returns and I don't know if you want to use your ammunition on that. I don't know what you're planning on doing, but since the Iron Forest is near where I need to go, I can lead you there. Just know that I won't go inside it like some idiot."
And an idiot I was, for that once we were there, I quickly told Gonta that I was planning on entering the anomaly. "Do as you wish." Gonta said, not even trying to stop me. "I don't know if its curiosity that attracts you, or greed, since that area has some pretty worthwhile artifacts, but I just hope you had your will written." He said as he started walking away, before abruptly stopping and telling me some further information. "Anyways, if you happen to chicken out or actually manage to get out of that place, remember to quickly run away and head north if you're wounded. There's a Stalker shelter there where everyone is accepted and you don't want to be injured in this area, it's swarming with Bloodsuckers. You know what they are, right? Big, tough, sneaky and a death sentence if surprised by one." He said as he abandoned me. I never heard of such a creature or mutant, but if Gonta was saying the truth, it must have existed.
I headed towards the Iron Forest and did indeed see some burn marks around it, along with some burnt corpse, to add a little variety. All of them Stalkers, no doubt. At first, I thought about shooting the invisible anomaly in order to know how wide its radius was and how far its bolts could affect a living being, but since that was quite counterproductive, since it would have left me defenseless if I used a portion of my limited supplies in an actual firefight against mutants or greedy Stalkers, I quickly took out a packet of rusty nails from my backpack. I then opened it and started tossing nails around, looking at bolts of thunder flying around. I was surprised that no-one had thought about this, probably because rusted nails aren't exactly common in the Zone. I just tested each step with a nail before walking forward, slowly reaching an area where smoke emanated from. It was where the chopper crashed no doubt.
I finally saw the chopper, only a remnant of its former glory. The fire caused by the crash had completely destroyed its systems and the pilot and gunner looked dead on arrival. However, there were two corpses nearby, meaning that they had survived the crash. However, by the time I had arrived they had died, and it didn't look like they reached the anomaly at all, since they weren't burnt at all like the Stalkers I saw previously. They were also clenching their weapons in their hands even in death, as if they were attempting a desperate defense against something or someone. I then noticed that they looked quite weak and old, despite the choppers having crashed only a day ago or so. As I analyzed the body, I noticed several holes around their neck, both in the same pattern. This could mean only one thing.
Suddenly, I heard a loud growl behind me, but as I turned around, there was nothing. I started looking at all of my surroundings to no avail and eventually thought that I was just being paranoid. Soon, however, I would feel a nauseating feeling behind my back, as if something was agitating its fleshy limbs around me. The thought filled me with disgust and fear, but I turned around, rifle in hand, firing wildly. I shouted.
And in that moment, the creature grabbed me with its disgusting hand, raising me in the air as if I was nothing. I then saw what it truly was: A humanoid figure with a repulsing mass of tentacles around its jaws instead of a mouth. It stared at me with its glowing eyes, devoid of pupils and emotion as it grunted, attempting to intimidate me. I quickly fired again, but found out that the monster's thick skin was too much for my rifle. The Zone had created a beast that could surpass even mankind's weaponry, and I was the third one to find out if the dead soldiers were any indications.
The creature was still somewhat harmed by my bullets, so it quickly shoved my gun aside and began feeding on me, piercing my clothes with its tendrils and sucking my blood dry. I cried as my legs felt limp and my hands wobbled. Despite that, with all of my strength, I struggled to grab the knife in my belt, but successfully cut off one of the beast's tentacles, as it released its grip and cried out in pain, leaving me on the floor, unable to move.
I'd grab my assault rifle and then realized that the long appendages the mutant had were his weakness. I slowly sprayed bullets in the direction of the creature's tentacles and watched as it dropped dead, its eerie, glowing eyes still open. I would however not go unscathed, as I was drained of blood and was now bleeding thanks to the punctures it caused. I then looked at the sky and realized that the Sun was about to set, and then I saw two more glowing eyes at the exit of the Iron Forest, both moving closer towards me.
I was scared.
A very edgy story with no originality written by yours truly.
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